Deployment

Our clock set to "Daddy time", since his time is many time zones  away from ours.

So we are currently living that part of military life called "Deployment" again.

It's not fun.

I have to be honest.
It doesn't get easier, no matter how many times you have been through it. 

In fact it seems to get harder as the years go on.  

There is nothing easy about having your other half, the person who has been your EVERYTHING for 15 years-half of your life, leaving for months at a time.

And it doesn't get easier on the children either. 
While  caring for them helps me to stay sane, helping them through their heartbreak also magnifies my own that much more.  

Bloom Where You Are Planted

Contentment is a choice. I think sometimes we forget that, especially those of us who are somewhere other than where we think we belong. As a military wife, I often see two groups of wives. Those who choose to make each duty station an adventure, and are excited to see what God has in store. And those who are miserable no matter where they are.

When we moved here, it was seriously the second to last place in the world we ever wanted to go (the last being Japan.. where my husband happened to spend 1 1/2 years of his life recently). But God's plans were bigger than ours, and He chose to put us in this place, and do nothing short of miraculous in our lives while we have been here. I would have missed out on so much beauty if I had not chosen to embrace this as God's will for my life.

The way I see it, I could CHOOSE to be miserable here, and find plenty of things to complain about, or I could CHOOSE to be excited about what our future holds, and open my eyes to the blessings given to me.

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:19

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Psalm 3:5-6


And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28


Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your

 minds in Christ Jesus.Philippians 4:11-13


I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 5:18-19

More Military Life

I’ve been so blessed by the feedback you’ve sent about my last blog about being a military wife. Praise God that He’s used it to touch so many of you!

I’ve been getting more "How do you do it?" questions lately. How do you really answer that question? Do I even know how I do it?
Lots of practice? We’ve had plenty of it, but that is not really it.
By God’s grace. Honestly, that is it.

Don’t get me wrong, it is never easy, but the Lord has taught ME so much through all this. To rely on Him to meet my need for companionship, to learn to be content in my circumstances..He has been to me more than I can even put into words to share with you all.

But how do we do it practically?

It’s really about choosing,  just like when he is home. Choosing to make it work. Choosing to put  hard work into our marriage. Choosing to put him first even though he is far away. Choosing to look for creative ways to show my love from far away, be it pictures, song lyrics, inside jokes, long love letters that pour my heart out, or even following through on requests he’s made…

We make a huge effort to stay in touch. We are so thankful for email. I email him through out the day to let him know what is going on here, things the children have said, or accomplished, my plans for the day. It helps him to be connected to our every day life. I also have an album on Facebook (now that we are blessed to have that luxury as well!) where I try to post pictures of every day life, so he can see what we’re up to. I ask his opinion  on things ("Should I replace the screen now, or wait until you are home?" "How should I handle this situation?" etc) Not because I can’t do it myself, but out of respect, and to keep him involved in our home and the decisions that go into running it.
We set up a time that he is available each day, and  that is "Daddy Time". He meets me at the computer at that time and the children either play by themselves or are in bed (depending on his watch schedule) so he and I can chat back and forth via email.  I plan all my events around this "daily date". It helps us to be able to keep in sync. My children know it is of the utmost importance that Mommy and Daddy have time together, even if we are worlds apart.

Before he leaves we take video of him reading, or even just talking to and playing with the children. Abigail watches these daily, but the boys still enjoy them too. His camera also takes short videos, so for Abigail’s birthday he was able to email a video of him saying "Happy Birthday".  It was the best gift she got, she was overjoyed that Daddy told her "Happy Birthday"! These videos have been a life saver on those "I miss Daddy too much" days.

military life

"I could never be a military wife, I wouldn’t like having my husband gone so much!". It is a statement said to me on a constant basis. My response has become " So you would rather live without your husband in your life at all, than have him gone sometimes?"
 It quiets the comments.

I met Peter when I was 15, he was 17. He had already joined the Navy. He had filed emancipation paperwork to join early. It was all he had dreamed of doing. Then I came into the picture. But they already owned him, so we had no choice but to build our life around it.

I do not love my husband less because his job requires him to be away. Instead I love him by keeping our home running well when he is away, trying my hardest to lessen his burden. I choose to be thankful for a steady paycheck and job security, instead of whining about the negatives this life includes. I look for creative ways to keep our relationship strong even when he is away. I teach my children to respect their Daddy and the sacrifices he makes to make sure they are well cared for.

How do I survive?

I keep myself busy when he is away. With three fairly young children, that isn’t too hard of a task. The first day he leaves, I know better than to make any plans. We put on DVDs and Mom pouts a bit, cries and gets it out of the way. Then I start with the busy-ness. The first week I clean like a crazy woman. Stuff that would never get done otherwise. Taking the vents down to wash them, cleaning under the dryer/washer, wiping every baseboard. Busily cleaning saves my sanity. Then we settle into our new routine of life without Dad. It may not be ideal, but we do the best with the life God has given us and try to embrace it with a thankful heart. We chose to be thankful there is a husband/Daddy in our lives, and the situation is only temporary.

For our family, homeschooling has been such a blessing in these last few crazy, constantly deployed years. When Daddy is home,we do NO school. We are available to him. If he has a half day, then we are available to play, or do whatever with him. If he wants to take a spontaneous road trip, we have no school obligations to hold us back. When he is deployed then we buckle down and make up for it. If we need to work until dinner time, that is fine because we can change dinner time. We can use weekends for field trips or fun projects we didn’t have time to do during the week.

I try to put more time and effort into building friendships with ladies from church, or in town when he is gone, since when he is home my focus is on him. I catch up on my leisure reading. I spend too much time online at night when I can not sleep in the cold lonely bed. I write him emails telling him every thing we do daily. I take lots of pictures to try and keep him tied in to every day life.

And then he comes home. And I cant help but wonder if all those wives who "could never do it" know what they are missing. The joy of being reunited after all that time is indescribable. They way your heart overflows with joy, and thankfulness is too much for words. It makes you certain to never take him for granted. It makes you thankful for the dirty socks on the floor, the dirty dishes on the coffee table, the muddy boot prints on the carpet. Because they mean he is home. And he is yours. And in the end that is all that matters.

Spring Ramblings

Life is good.
We’re thankful to see Spring arrive, even though we’ve only had 2 days of nice spring weather so far! We celebrated the first day of spring with some festive cupcakes and fresh squeezed lemonade.

 I’ve been spending my days enjoying being the mother of a toddler again. Abigail is walking all over now, and is the biggest goofball. She has always been so full of opinions and personality, but even more so now that she can express herself! She always has a goofy face on(examples below), and loves to give kisses! She misses Daddy terribly, and every morning talks to the picture of him hanging in the dining room, and she often comes to the computer and starts waiving at the screen calling Dada (We use Skype for video calls when he pulls into port, and she seems to think she should be able to talk to him whenever she feels like it. Luckily we have some videos of him we can play and it appeases her temporarily).

We’ve been starting the garden. This year I decided to really focus on flowers as well as veggies so we put in a bed in the front, and filled it with a few flowers and lots of bulbs and seeds. We are now anxiously anticipating seeing it grow and bloom. Next we’ll get started on the veggies on the other side of the garage.

We’ve been enjoying watching the birds arrive with spring as well. The hummingbirds are in full swing, always fighting each other over the feeder, and swooping at us if we get to close! We hang our feeder right outside the playroom window so it’s fun to watch them through out the day. This year we are down to just 1 feeder; the wind broke 2 of ours last year, plus those hummers were costing me a fortune in sugar! I was filling each feeder daily (2 cups of nectar each)!
We have suet outside the boys’ bedroom as well. I haven’t gotten to the bird store to pick up any seed or finch mix yet.  Today we  watched a Downy Woodpecker, Sparrows, Red Winged Blackbirds,  Chickadees and a few male Finches come to the one feeder over the course of about half an hour while we played Battleship!

Last week we enjoyed this fun spring dessert! The boys thought it was the greatest thing ever! Chocolate ice cream with gummy worms, and crumbled Oreo dirt on top. Sugar overload, but so worth it to see their faces!
Hope you are all enjoying spring as well!
A recipe for the Birds:

HUMMINGBIRD NECTAR

In pyrex measuring cup ½ c sugar, 2 c water microwave until it boils let cool and store extra in fridge